Notes from the Underground 11/01/24

The Griffin spent Halloween night in the office this year getting this very edition together for you. Stuff got weird though, man. Peter put on a cape and immediately embodied the persona of our coven’s High Priestess, the staff got way too sugar high and put another hole in the ceiling, it was revealed that Editor-in-Chief Ava Green does not in fact leave the office and sleeps in there, dangling upside down from the ceiling like Dracula, and more gummy body parts were added to the snack bucket. 

There’s a big hole in the ground in the Quad and The Underground’s first reaction was to do what we do best: put a finger in it.

President Stoute just came back from a disappointing weekend competing in and losing a singing competition. The judges apparently caught wind of his public speeches and appearances which are notoriously tone deaf. 

The Underground always looks for the positive in the negative! For example, if we have to cut faculty, that at least means we can tear down Churchill. 

The election is coming up! The Underground is proud to politically identify as a “no values voter,” meaning that The Underground is voting for what it deems would be worst for everyone! Good luck and God bless! 

The Underground has declared its candidacy for the presidency, and our slogan: “Fam, it is time to Answer the Call with an attitude of gratitude.” 

The Underground reminds its loyal voters that early voting is open from now until the election. The Underground reminds you to vote early and vote often.

A group of Griffin editors got to visit the roof of Old Main on Wednesday, including Chloe Breen, Maddy Lockwood and Editor-in-Chief Ava Green. Not present was Managing Editor Jon Dusza, who’s still lamenting the missed opportunity to enact the order of succession by giving Ava just a tiny, little push.