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The Griffin

Notes from the Underground 12/03/21

If we’re gonna build a new Bills stadium just so we can have extra suites for the patricians and Wi-Fi for the plebeians, The Underground thinks we might as well go full on Roman and build underground pits for our gladia… football players.


The Underground thinks it’s appropriate that U.K. Prime Minister Boris Johnson pronounced “Omicron” as “Oh-my-cron.” His policies will undoubtedly have the world going “Oh, my God.”


What do you call recent information about fragile things? Breaking news.


Bad tariff policy is the only thing that is Made in America these days.


The Underground advises anyone who thinks “cancel culture” is a mainstream American problem to check out our neighbors in Pennsylvania. Amish cancel culture is brutal.


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