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Notes from Underground 4/21/23

The Griffin

On Giving Day, the classes of 2024, 2025 and 2026 raised $1,290 combined. The Class of 2023 raised $3,870 — exactly three times as much. The Underground certainly would never do anything so silly like donating enough to make a point in the student newspaper. It just thinks this… coincidence… proves the senior class is worth three times its weight.


The Underground didn’t feel the need to donate — its presence is enough of a donation. And its contributions are more than philanthropic.


There are rumors that The Underground plotted against a certain Opinion Section Editor and were responsible for a near-death experience with her glass water bottle. Upon opening it, it shattered, sending a shard into her neck and causing minor injuries.


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